Fragile -- Part 1/?
Mar. 16th, 2007 03:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
deeperwondermentTitle: Fragile
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
not_from_stars
Fandom: Charmed
Pairing: Phoebe/Cole
Words: 2,087
Author's Note: This was started as an answer to the "Fragile" prompt at![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
theatrical_muse and it just kind of kept going from there. This is how I envision Phoebe's reaction to having to vanquish The Source and losing her baby -- NOT the way the show handled it. As some dear friends so eloquently put it : "We are smarter than Brad Kern".
You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand ~~Three Days Grace
There are many definitions of fragile...
She faced off with the demon that was advancing on her and her hand twitched slightly.
It had only been a week since her sisters had come into the Penthouse she had shared with Cole. Only a week since she had been forced to choose between her sisters and the evil bastard that had usurped the body of the man she had loved more than her own life. Only a week since the vanquishing spell had destroyed The Source of All Evil -- and her husband, Cole Turner, along with him. Only a week since she had lost almost everything that had been important to her.
Now? Now she hunted.
The demon launched himself at her and Phoebe didn't move. When his nails scraped along her side, she turned into him and shoved her hand forward. As he dug deep gouges in her side, she sliced up with the athame she had held hidden along her arm.
She stumbled back as the demon burst into flames. "For him," she said softly as she watched the demon die.
After the demon exploded, leaving nothing behind, Phoebe wiped the athame off on her jeans, and then put it away. The athame lived in a special sheath she had commissioned from a friend of hers who did leather work. The sheath was worn over her shoulder and along her side. It was perfect for hiding under the leather jacket that she had taken to wearing so often nowadays.
Like the athame, the leather jacket had belonged to him.
She grimaced as she looked down to take in her bloody shirt. That one had gotten a little too close to reaching internal organs with his claws. She should probably get home to her sisters or their whitelighter before too long. She would be in for a lecture about endangering herself needlessly like this. However, she would do what she did everytime one of them said something like that. She would tune out the lecture and nod absently at them.
Then she would go up to the Book of Shadows and do more research.
It might have amused some people to draw comparisons between what she was doing now and what Piper had done right after Prue died. If anyone had said that to her or Piper right now, her sister might have blown them up. Phoebe was volatile right now and both Piper and Paige were seeing a fragility in her that they had never seen before. She was moving through life one day at a time -- if you could call what she was doing living. Her heart and soul were gone, taken when they had lost Cole. Piper couldn't imagine the pain her baby sister was in. Cole had been the love of her life and it haunted all of them that they hadn't been able to come up with a way to save him. To see her baby sister, once known as the one with the largest heart and the most giving and trusting nature of all of the Halliwells, so flat and emotionless was something that cut at her heart deeply. Phoebe was empty now and Piper and Paige didn't know how to help her.
So, Piper would watch Phoebe go out on her hunts and pray that she didn't lose her like she had lost Prue. She just could not lose another sister.
The only weapon Phoebe carried on these hunts of hers was the athame.
Cole's athame.
The athame that was starting to become an anathema to demons and warlocks everywhere. They called the athame Evil's Bane and it was well known that it had once belonged to the demonic soldier of fortune, Belthazor. There were many stories about how a Charmed One had come into possession of the athame. They were mostly false.
For her part? Phoebe didn't care what they thought. What she did know was that she would kill as many demons as she could with Cole's athame. It was her focus. She would make them all pay for what had happened to her love.
They would die for the loss of everything she had held dear.
There were many examples of fragile.
Cole being killed had shown the fragility of the heart and soul.
The demons she killed now were showing how fragile they were when compared to a weapon wielded by someone who felt she had nothing left to lose.
Much later that night, Phoebe stumbled downstairs and into her bedroom. She got undressed and slid under the covers. Three demons in six hours. Three demons who thought that without the power of the Source she was helpless. Three demons who turned out to be so very wrong. She was rather battered and bruised, but she welcomed the pain right now. She would rather feel pain than nothing at all. The nothing at all was what she had been feeling inside since she watched Cole be vanquished at the hands of her and her sisters.
She was really good at burying how shattered she felt while she tried to live through each day. She buried her face in Cole's pillow that she had retrieved from the penthouse and hid her tears in the pillow. She couldn't allow anyone to see how upset she still was or else she could never continue going forward with what she was doing. So she buried everything very deep inside and didn't let herself feel it. She had to focus; had to keep on hunting the demons from the Underworld. The physical pain when a demon got in a lucky strike reminded her of what she was doing this for.
If he was here now he would be upset about all of the scars she was starting to pick up -- even with Paige and Leo healing the worst of the wounds she received.
Of course, if he was here, she wouldn't be out doing this. If they had been able to separate The Source from Cole, she wouldn't be out seeking vengeance for him like she was.
He pressed his hand against the bleeding wounds in his side and looked down at them in confusion. Nothing had attacked him for a few days. The beast here wasn't even known for leaving any kind of mark when he attacked. He just attacked and that was it. He either killed you or he didn't. So... why was he bleeding?
This wasn't the first time it had happened and he was beginning to get pissed off.
"If you're going to let me be attacked and wounded you should at least let me see what's attacking me, damn it," he yelled. His voice echoed over the Wastelands and he cursed again. Of course, there was no answer. He really didn't expect one.
He walked along the rocks, keeping off of the sands except when he saw the blue swirls floating above on the sands. Everytime he saw one of those swirls, he jumped into it, feeling power surge up through him. Doing this kept the beast from defeating him. He wasn't ready to let go and die.
Until he could figure out a way to check on his soulmate and make sure she was safe, he couldn't move on.
He remembered being trapped in his own body and watching through the Source's eyes as Phoebe helped her sisters recite the vanquishing spell that would destroy the Source. He watched as Phoebe's sisters had to help support her to keep her on her feet as she took part in the spell.
"I'm sorry, baby" he could hear her whisper. "I am so sorry."
The Source had been shocked. He hadn't believed that Phoebe would ever have pulled away from his control to stand with her sisters. He couldn't believe that she would actually vanquish the man she loved. He had underestimated Phoebe and her sisters. Her sisters had been able to break through his and the Seer's control to show her that the man running the show was not in fact Cole. The Source's main mistake had been in assuming that Phoebe would ever believe that Cole would have harmed her sisters -- no matter what. When The Source had decided to try to kill her sisters, that was when he had lost possession of Phoebe.
He sat down on a stone cliff to rest and he buried his face in his hands.
"Phoebe," he whispered. "Phoebe, I love you."
That would be when he felt something wet dripping down his face. He put his hand up to his face and when he pulled it back down to look at what was there, his eyes widened. His fingers were now coated in what appeared to be blood.
"What the hell is going on?"
The knife sliced across her cheek as she tried to get out of the way. She tumbled sideways and the energy ball caught her in the chest, knocking her into the wall. She gasped out in pain, but wasn't able to get up. The demon came and stood over her, and then smiled down at her.
"Your luck has run out, witch," he said as he summoned another energy ball, only to cry out and stumble back as Phoebe shoved the athame up and into him.
"Not yet it hasn't," she gasped out as he exploded. She had just grabbed the athame when something came down hard on the back of her head and she crumpled.
The second demon reached down and jerked her up by the back of her neck, throwing her across the street like she was a rag doll. He watched as she hit and was satisfied that she was unconscious. He stalked to her and lifted her up by the throat, a triumphant smile on his face. "Game over, Charmed One," he snarled, conjuring an athame to his other hand.
"Yeah, for you," a new voice said. "Athame!"
The athame disappeared from his hand and he turned around to see two other women running towards him and the unconscious witch. The one with the longer hair flicked her hands and he expoded into tiny particles.
Paige and Piper finished running to Phoebe's side and they crouched beside her.
"Leo!" Piper screamed as she took in the massive bleeding of her sister. "Leo!"
Leo materialized and he uttered a curse when he saw what condition Phoebe was in. "She is going to get herself killed if she doesn't stop this," he warned Piper as he worked on healing his charge.
"She lost the love of her life, Leo," Piper said quietly. "If it was you..."
"But it wasn't." He sighed, gathering Phoebe up. "Let's get her home so I can heal her easier and without the threat of more demons arriving."
Phoebe looked in the mirror at the scar that was now on her cheek right above her chin. It was one more scar that she had gained in this private little war she was fighting against the Underworld. Paige could probably heal it the rest of the way if she let her, or they could glamour it away. However, like the others, she was wearing it as a badge right now. Seeing the scars reminded her of everything she had lost and what she was doing this for. She traced the scar in the mirror slowly, watching her eyes. She didn't even recognize the person she saw looking out at her any longer. The pain shining in those eyes in the mirror were so different than who she used to be, her eyes were ringed with black circles that made it look like she never slept. So much had changed in the last few weeks.
She turned quickly from the mirror and went into her bedroom. Her gaze fell on the teddy bear, one of the gifts he had bought for her and tears filled her eyes. His name echoed in the black stillness of her mind and with a shiver of vivid recollection, she remembered the aftermath of what had happened at the Penthouse. The tears slipped down her face as the images raced unbidden through her memory.
"Cole..."
The pain slammed into him, jerking him out of his reverie.
"Cole..."
He heard his name spoken with such desolation and longing that he knew it could only be coming from one person.
"Phoebe."
Author:
not_from_starsFandom: Charmed
Pairing: Phoebe/Cole
Words: 2,087
Author's Note: This was started as an answer to the "Fragile" prompt at
theatrical_muse and it just kind of kept going from there. This is how I envision Phoebe's reaction to having to vanquish The Source and losing her baby -- NOT the way the show handled it. As some dear friends so eloquently put it : "We are smarter than Brad Kern".You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand ~~Three Days Grace
There are many definitions of fragile...
She faced off with the demon that was advancing on her and her hand twitched slightly.
It had only been a week since her sisters had come into the Penthouse she had shared with Cole. Only a week since she had been forced to choose between her sisters and the evil bastard that had usurped the body of the man she had loved more than her own life. Only a week since the vanquishing spell had destroyed The Source of All Evil -- and her husband, Cole Turner, along with him. Only a week since she had lost almost everything that had been important to her.
Now? Now she hunted.
The demon launched himself at her and Phoebe didn't move. When his nails scraped along her side, she turned into him and shoved her hand forward. As he dug deep gouges in her side, she sliced up with the athame she had held hidden along her arm.
She stumbled back as the demon burst into flames. "For him," she said softly as she watched the demon die.
After the demon exploded, leaving nothing behind, Phoebe wiped the athame off on her jeans, and then put it away. The athame lived in a special sheath she had commissioned from a friend of hers who did leather work. The sheath was worn over her shoulder and along her side. It was perfect for hiding under the leather jacket that she had taken to wearing so often nowadays.
Like the athame, the leather jacket had belonged to him.
She grimaced as she looked down to take in her bloody shirt. That one had gotten a little too close to reaching internal organs with his claws. She should probably get home to her sisters or their whitelighter before too long. She would be in for a lecture about endangering herself needlessly like this. However, she would do what she did everytime one of them said something like that. She would tune out the lecture and nod absently at them.
Then she would go up to the Book of Shadows and do more research.
It might have amused some people to draw comparisons between what she was doing now and what Piper had done right after Prue died. If anyone had said that to her or Piper right now, her sister might have blown them up. Phoebe was volatile right now and both Piper and Paige were seeing a fragility in her that they had never seen before. She was moving through life one day at a time -- if you could call what she was doing living. Her heart and soul were gone, taken when they had lost Cole. Piper couldn't imagine the pain her baby sister was in. Cole had been the love of her life and it haunted all of them that they hadn't been able to come up with a way to save him. To see her baby sister, once known as the one with the largest heart and the most giving and trusting nature of all of the Halliwells, so flat and emotionless was something that cut at her heart deeply. Phoebe was empty now and Piper and Paige didn't know how to help her.
So, Piper would watch Phoebe go out on her hunts and pray that she didn't lose her like she had lost Prue. She just could not lose another sister.
The only weapon Phoebe carried on these hunts of hers was the athame.
Cole's athame.
The athame that was starting to become an anathema to demons and warlocks everywhere. They called the athame Evil's Bane and it was well known that it had once belonged to the demonic soldier of fortune, Belthazor. There were many stories about how a Charmed One had come into possession of the athame. They were mostly false.
For her part? Phoebe didn't care what they thought. What she did know was that she would kill as many demons as she could with Cole's athame. It was her focus. She would make them all pay for what had happened to her love.
They would die for the loss of everything she had held dear.
There were many examples of fragile.
Cole being killed had shown the fragility of the heart and soul.
The demons she killed now were showing how fragile they were when compared to a weapon wielded by someone who felt she had nothing left to lose.
Much later that night, Phoebe stumbled downstairs and into her bedroom. She got undressed and slid under the covers. Three demons in six hours. Three demons who thought that without the power of the Source she was helpless. Three demons who turned out to be so very wrong. She was rather battered and bruised, but she welcomed the pain right now. She would rather feel pain than nothing at all. The nothing at all was what she had been feeling inside since she watched Cole be vanquished at the hands of her and her sisters.
She was really good at burying how shattered she felt while she tried to live through each day. She buried her face in Cole's pillow that she had retrieved from the penthouse and hid her tears in the pillow. She couldn't allow anyone to see how upset she still was or else she could never continue going forward with what she was doing. So she buried everything very deep inside and didn't let herself feel it. She had to focus; had to keep on hunting the demons from the Underworld. The physical pain when a demon got in a lucky strike reminded her of what she was doing this for.
If he was here now he would be upset about all of the scars she was starting to pick up -- even with Paige and Leo healing the worst of the wounds she received.
Of course, if he was here, she wouldn't be out doing this. If they had been able to separate The Source from Cole, she wouldn't be out seeking vengeance for him like she was.
He pressed his hand against the bleeding wounds in his side and looked down at them in confusion. Nothing had attacked him for a few days. The beast here wasn't even known for leaving any kind of mark when he attacked. He just attacked and that was it. He either killed you or he didn't. So... why was he bleeding?
This wasn't the first time it had happened and he was beginning to get pissed off.
"If you're going to let me be attacked and wounded you should at least let me see what's attacking me, damn it," he yelled. His voice echoed over the Wastelands and he cursed again. Of course, there was no answer. He really didn't expect one.
He walked along the rocks, keeping off of the sands except when he saw the blue swirls floating above on the sands. Everytime he saw one of those swirls, he jumped into it, feeling power surge up through him. Doing this kept the beast from defeating him. He wasn't ready to let go and die.
Until he could figure out a way to check on his soulmate and make sure she was safe, he couldn't move on.
He remembered being trapped in his own body and watching through the Source's eyes as Phoebe helped her sisters recite the vanquishing spell that would destroy the Source. He watched as Phoebe's sisters had to help support her to keep her on her feet as she took part in the spell.
"I'm sorry, baby" he could hear her whisper. "I am so sorry."
The Source had been shocked. He hadn't believed that Phoebe would ever have pulled away from his control to stand with her sisters. He couldn't believe that she would actually vanquish the man she loved. He had underestimated Phoebe and her sisters. Her sisters had been able to break through his and the Seer's control to show her that the man running the show was not in fact Cole. The Source's main mistake had been in assuming that Phoebe would ever believe that Cole would have harmed her sisters -- no matter what. When The Source had decided to try to kill her sisters, that was when he had lost possession of Phoebe.
He sat down on a stone cliff to rest and he buried his face in his hands.
"Phoebe," he whispered. "Phoebe, I love you."
That would be when he felt something wet dripping down his face. He put his hand up to his face and when he pulled it back down to look at what was there, his eyes widened. His fingers were now coated in what appeared to be blood.
"What the hell is going on?"
The knife sliced across her cheek as she tried to get out of the way. She tumbled sideways and the energy ball caught her in the chest, knocking her into the wall. She gasped out in pain, but wasn't able to get up. The demon came and stood over her, and then smiled down at her.
"Your luck has run out, witch," he said as he summoned another energy ball, only to cry out and stumble back as Phoebe shoved the athame up and into him.
"Not yet it hasn't," she gasped out as he exploded. She had just grabbed the athame when something came down hard on the back of her head and she crumpled.
The second demon reached down and jerked her up by the back of her neck, throwing her across the street like she was a rag doll. He watched as she hit and was satisfied that she was unconscious. He stalked to her and lifted her up by the throat, a triumphant smile on his face. "Game over, Charmed One," he snarled, conjuring an athame to his other hand.
"Yeah, for you," a new voice said. "Athame!"
The athame disappeared from his hand and he turned around to see two other women running towards him and the unconscious witch. The one with the longer hair flicked her hands and he expoded into tiny particles.
Paige and Piper finished running to Phoebe's side and they crouched beside her.
"Leo!" Piper screamed as she took in the massive bleeding of her sister. "Leo!"
Leo materialized and he uttered a curse when he saw what condition Phoebe was in. "She is going to get herself killed if she doesn't stop this," he warned Piper as he worked on healing his charge.
"She lost the love of her life, Leo," Piper said quietly. "If it was you..."
"But it wasn't." He sighed, gathering Phoebe up. "Let's get her home so I can heal her easier and without the threat of more demons arriving."
Phoebe looked in the mirror at the scar that was now on her cheek right above her chin. It was one more scar that she had gained in this private little war she was fighting against the Underworld. Paige could probably heal it the rest of the way if she let her, or they could glamour it away. However, like the others, she was wearing it as a badge right now. Seeing the scars reminded her of everything she had lost and what she was doing this for. She traced the scar in the mirror slowly, watching her eyes. She didn't even recognize the person she saw looking out at her any longer. The pain shining in those eyes in the mirror were so different than who she used to be, her eyes were ringed with black circles that made it look like she never slept. So much had changed in the last few weeks.
She turned quickly from the mirror and went into her bedroom. Her gaze fell on the teddy bear, one of the gifts he had bought for her and tears filled her eyes. His name echoed in the black stillness of her mind and with a shiver of vivid recollection, she remembered the aftermath of what had happened at the Penthouse. The tears slipped down her face as the images raced unbidden through her memory.
"Cole..."
The pain slammed into him, jerking him out of his reverie.
"Cole..."
He heard his name spoken with such desolation and longing that he knew it could only be coming from one person.
"Phoebe."
